kevin brought a 6ft brunette runway model with him tonight. Now, im not sure what the fuck the color of the " i get it, its over, Im ugly" flag is.... but i'll wave it.
You're not pinnochio. Lying isn't going to make it bigger.
do you know your status is "goal for vegas: hook up with a girl AND a boy"?
and THATS why i'm not adding my mom on facebook
I'm ready for this little girl to leave so I can hit the bong already
I almost stepped in a homeless mans stream of urine as he was peeing. I love this city.
Cute boy and deffffff wearing a HS shirt. I am getting too old to be inaccurate.
He's a prodigy! It would be a service to the scientific community.
15 is 15
Drunk texting is the poetry of my life
He must have found my secret supply of blow and took a bump before we left the house. Rude.
He could of at least asked
I'm going to start charging you rent if you keep leaving your random conquests on my living room couch the morning after
I'm fucking sick of guys. I think I'm going to date myself. No drama. And I know I'll always put out.
It was a fun night. I made out with the door guy at the gay bar but he didn't speak english
There was no door guy at the bar
It's 2 am on the long weekend and what am I doing? Sitting alone in my room eating chips and queso and watching Rio. Fuck I need to get laid.
SOOOOOO I just attempted to go to the gym, hungover. Ended up throwing up in the bathroom. I hope people think I'm just working out really hard
Went online to check my credit card... $147.87 at Waffle House. $632.36 at "Red Rose Gentleman's Club" and a $1000 cash advance from an ATM. I may no longer be a fiancé.
Randomize
