I don't know where your sunglasses are, I was too preoccupied with girls not old enough to drive past midnight.
First date: that requires underwear, huh?
Just a heads up, i'm sleeping in te back seat of your car so don't be freaked out when you see me in the A.M.
And then he told me he was too tired for me to suck his dick. Physically and mentally too tired for me to suck his dick. What the fuck?
We wore fake mustaches and shirts that said team mustache ride to a party we weren't even invited to
He tied me to the bed, fucked me and left me tied up until he proved to his room mates that he actually fucked me. But other than that, best sex ever!
NEW INFORMATION meech found me passed out on a bench outside.
I wish the sun would stop judging me for being drunk while it's still shining.
No sex in the champagne room. The champagne room being my life
Drunk girl in a bikini just tried to bite my face, it's officially spring break
that man is just a bundle of powerful magic and poor judgment
New reason to drink: alcohol makes soda taste like goddamn gold.
How long until you're healed?
Physically? A week or so. Emotionally? The scars of dislocating my knee at a frat and flashing my panties to the whole crowd wi never heal.
I am naked, and drinking straight gin with a flat tonic chaser. I had such greater hopes for myself as a child.
yea...tonic water is fucking gross.
Ugh... The hoe gods giveth and the hoe gods taketh away.
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