Nicole vs. Life
you know you should just kill yourself when you are helping your 16 year-old sister get ready for a date and you're going out to dinner with you parents..
I'm not even planning on drinking that much tonight.. but I'm writing "emergency contact number" and your number on my hand just in case
i cant finish this easy-mac because i need it for a chaser.
we convinced you the moon was a planet...again
wanna hang out tonight and remember it?
Your braces fetish is going to end up biting you in the dick.
i keep seeing random pieces of my outfit all around town.
Hey they cleaned all the blood out of the elevator. Also could you pick up some nachos?
To drink from my fkask next to a cop car or to not drink from my flask next to a cop car
Definitely broke my toe and messed up my knee walking back. Drink hitch hiking should never happen again.
You don't know reunion panic until you've exfoliated your butt cheeks.
Is it inappropriate to match with someone on tinder just to ask if the friend in his profile picture is single?
You chipped your front tooth on the toilet bowl. Should I call your dentist?
What is ur current declared sexuality for my bingo board
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