I no longer want to be the gay that plays in the revolving door at RelationshipDale's like a seven year old with a.d.d.
you're putting all your eggs in a very hungover basket
There's a naked kid on the floor on your side of the bed. Don't freak out when you wake up. I think we need to fix the lock on the door...
Don't play hard to get, I've seen some of the girls you've slept with.
just walk of shamed past a man riding a bike. RIDING A BIKE. what a wholesome life he must lead.
Its going to be drunk as shit/pirate themed. Im dressing as the former.
These are your "grown up" slampiece's new hours of operation; please plan accordingly
Jesus, I just want to drink. Also simultaneously punch things and rub my vagina on them.
I would just like to point out that someone I had sex with drove me so I could have sex with you. I deserve some type of "most loyal booty call ever" award.
If we can put a man on the moon, I'm sure we can turn a pringles can into a bong.
One day soon I'll learn the difference between a good high and way too high. Today is not the day.
I'm just gonna back away slowly and come back when there's less weird crap.
There's a possibility I may have hooked up with that British guy...
Possibility? You left the door open! Everyone saw!
HE LIVES IN ANOTHER STATE
actually scratch that last text, he's the perfect boyfriend. He stays faithful and doesnt find out about all the guys here. it's a win-win
I’ll always remember that day you sent me that random nude on accident lmao changed my life
Randomize
