So A**** bought my story about how my hickey was a bruise from wrestling
on one hand i'm glad that i'm not in trouble...on the other hand i realized that the reason i cheat on her is because she is so stupid
elementary school lunch room party. everyone brings their own lunch and can trade stuff. all juice is booze.
he was writing an apology letter to his liver in shakespearean english... That much fun...
she literally hasn't taken the mardi gras beads off in three days. she showered in them. TWICE.
Cute underage boy is in my house.
OH MY GOD. DON'T DO ANYTHING. WHY IS HE IN YOUR HOUSE.
And have you ever tried to explain a hickey to your own grandmother?
I have a rage boner right now. An actual erection brought on by the amount of sheer hatred I have towards nationwide.
But I mean how many guys can say they get blow jobs and grilled cheese with football
They're magnificent. It's like god made her last but hadn't fulfilled his boob quota.
I was shitfaced. I filled my contact case WITH TANNING LOTION
I sent a picture of my balls to one of my best friends, so basically it was an average night.
Sorry you saw me having sex with your brother on the beach
does anyone know where bryan is?
last i saw he was naked, and crying in the bathroom because there was no more booze.
so we’ve decided to fuck for our own health
I now have scissors specifically made for cutting dicks off.
Randomize
