Do you think they could tell I was high on that conf call?
Yea went to the bars and he called me 2 hours later with random people saying he is at a place that i don't think exists
There's guys at my school running around throwing potatoes shouting "remember the famine." makes me proud to be Irish.
He showed up to the Seder drunk and tried to convince everyone that he could read Hebrew.
watching "look who's talking now." getting choked up at the end when they find each other at the cabin
doesn't that movie star kirstie alley and have talking dogs in it? new low...even for you
theres a difference between trying to make someone happy and letting them fuck you in the ass
You said "i miss him" not "i miss his dick." You're getting emotionally attatched. Shame.
It was darkish out, I was shit faced, and they should have marked the electric fence a little more clearly. The entire wedding reception saw me run full force into it
haha all our friends are at the carnival and I'm on stage dry humping a 40 year old
Called Apple, my penis pics are safe.
He gets married Father's Day weekend and I just found out I'm pregnant. What do I do?
You said too many real things and now I need to crawl back inside my protective fort of sarcasm, being an asshole, and sass
I wonder if Paul and Andy realize how lucky that they are that we're too lazy to start fucking other dudes so we just stick with them
The guy at the liqiour store just said "Wow haven't seen you in awhile, is everything okay?"
He was eating me out on a picnic table on the frame lake trail and right after I came, a group of hikers walked around the corner. Stood up just in time
And this is one of the many reasons why you need a car.
Randomize
