I just made out with a guy for $7.
Dude I just picked up a married chick while her husband was playing pool.
What do you mean you picked her up? How are you gonna leave the bar?
I didn't. I fucked her in the men's room. Come get me before he finds out.
So Delta doesn't take cash. I used my card to buy a drink and asked the attendant if she could leave it open.
Let's face it. We both have sexy parts. Why not have them touch?!
Said he had been eating pineapple for a week before our 1st date. Not sure if thankful for his consideration or offended by his assumption.
at one point he was caressing me in the kitchen asking me my name over and over again and then asking what my favorite continent was
Don't use the things I tell you while drunk after the bruins won the cup against me
I'm just gonna plan on never getting a bf. everything I touch turns to gay
I don't know what it was about last night, but every bar that i went to there was at least one girl there that i had done something with. I'm sure the girl that i went with knew because they all grabbed my penis and told me to call them.
I'm 99% sure I just flashed my dad with my vagina. So that's the new low now.
Besides, I don't need any more men there who have seen my tits. #bearwatch2014
JUST DENIED A NEW YEARS KISS BECAUSE HE WAS A COWBOYS FAN.
I doubt the gods of funday Sunday would exact such a high price... But it's good to know an afternoon with me is worth a left foot.
It’s like a sexy version of those choose your own adventure books from when we were kids. No matter what you choose, there will be penis!
He ate me out for my sailor moon manga and I gave him a blowjob for his Devilman manga. Pretty sweet deal imo
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