Do you think there are girls out there that really do like small penis?
Where are you? I just made a vodka + cranberry & I’m going to drive there & throw it in your face
i just got offered coke by a strung out pilot. my night just got a lot more interesting.
Wow, you know I need to stop drinking alone when I pour my drink into my hand and offer it to my dog,
we dont know what were doing after yet. first up we have 90 beers and a party kit and fun hats.
I think I'm cybering, it's been a while and its more in depth than it was in 8Th grade.
Can the rest of this semester just go by as a montage?
So I'm pretty sure I fucked the dept of homeland security guy on my kitchen table. No recollection of it, but there are signs.
just found a shoebox labled "emergency smoking box"... it has a lightbulb, 2 potatoes, a dried up flower, and a button that says "stop drop and roll". what did we do last night?!
i just got cum up my nose. i would have expected more from the captain of the men's lacrosse team
Ok, so for future reference, in Rome, "piano bar" means "brothel".
i woke up with a wedding ring drawn on my finger...if this was vegas id be worried
did you really just refer to me me as an old fashioned penis?
You grinded and hooked up with a middle aged tiger woods look-a-like with manboobs. Tequila isn't for you.
I want you to defile me in my childhood bed.
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