I did the walk of shame to another booty call
I don't think that should turn me on, but it does
I just tried to drunkenly fart the beat of Disturbia by Rihanna
do you think they make care bear costumes for cats?
That's why girls suck all the time. Blah blah nag nag drama drama buy me things but I won't touch your penis
is there an easy way to say "i didnt plan on sleeping with you until i saw how drunk you were" ?
i finally watched harry potter... a tad unrealistic if you ask me... i mean a ginger kid with 2 friends?
of all places to pass out....why right in front of our RA's door? OF ALL PLACES.
In the future let's not drunk dive in the fountain in front of the hotel bar.
The question is do I invite my fuck buddy to my graduation party now that my girfriend found out about her?
lit a joint with my parents wedding matches today, this is what happens when you're out of lighter fluid. didnt even feel guilty.
All I want is a guy who will love me and occasionally shave my balls.
So the next three days will be henceforth known as the 'celebration of the end of the most irresponsible years of my life' be prepared to wake up naked in a ditch.
Hey its me your friend who impressed the pharmacist by already knowing the generic version of plan b by name
its like probably shouldnt be sending pics of your asshole to strangers who work in the same building as you
It's next to that place that has cock fighting.
Randomize
