Dude ! Why is there vomit with whole pieces of sushi in the shower when the toilet is not more than 2 feet away ? btw you need to chew your food better,
I'm almost 25, which means I can ride with girls that have permits
My aunt just said- "pizza is like sex. Even if it ain't good it ain't bad." Obviously she doesn't know us too well.
doooooooo herrrrrrrrr
I'm out of practice. be my yoda
put your penis in her you must.
I am 90% sure the kid in front of me in class is picking his face spots, smelling it, and then eating it. That is a LOT of % sure for something like that.
Would you still love me if I had no teeth
Yeah why?
Cuz i woke up this morning and a few are gone
I really wanna punch him. Right in his cell-phone-sized penis
He has a really nice penis but its like a model that wasn't built to scale
You'd be surprised at how many crooked penises are out there
I'm bringing vagina and cookies. You'll be fine.
I just realized I turned down a booty call too. To make cheesecake. God help us all
WHY DID I INFORM THE ENTIRE BATHROOM I DONT HAVE AN STD?!?!?!!
Was having the best sex dream I've had in a while and only woke up when I heard my grandma fall down the stairs.
I don't care if he's the coolest coworker, if he's living in his mom's basement at 30 you should not buy drugs from him
I'm drinking apple juice and champagne while watching crossroads..like the classy bitch that i am.
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