Well I don't think you could recreate that hangover if you tried. It was like the perfect storm of hangovers.
I'm sorry but when I'm riding in the trunk on the way to mcdonalds at 6 am I just don't want to listen to reba macintire
Can you bring me a pair of sunglasses to the bathroom please... Don't judge me.
There are going to be so many Snookis this Halloween that I might just dress as the guy that hit her and punch them all in the face
Your one and only job is to make sure I am on that bus tomorrow morning with no cat makeup on my face
He just "revenge puked" on her kid. I think we'll be leaving soon.
My dad caught me fucking in the pool last night. He proceeded to tell me I needed to "quiet things down" while this guys dick was still in me. Worst daughter ever.
Do me a favor. Next time I think it's a good idea to take pulls from the handle, yell "FALCON PUNCH" and uppercut me in the taint. My future liver thanks you.
Yeah. I don't think I have anything left in me tho. I think I was throwing up tangible memories at one point.
I'm glad you have such faith in my ability to find the worst situations with my vagina.
in the middle of getting head my cat meowed. she looked up , meowed back, and then continued giving me head.
His chest is so hairy i want to pet it with my nipples.
It's confirmed. I have two dates on Saturday, and they are both named Mike.
I just put my eye make up on in the bathroom of the bar.... I may be too comfortable here....
I just saw a guy faceplant off a unicycle while holding a saxophone, while his buddy riding another unicycle and sporting a flute rode by laughing
Only at UConn...
Randomize
