I seriously wish I was FB friends with her
IM NOT LETTING YOU PEE ON ME IF THATS WHAT YOURE GETTING AT.
"Tonight I'm turning swine flu into an std" this might be how zombies come about. Peace civilization.
i am not listening to taylor swift on a pink ipod. totally not happening.
sorry we overslept. have a good day at work. p.s. thanks for making it feel like my vagina got hit by a train.
stumble upon led me to how to make wine in prison, followed by wedding dresses. it knows my life too well
We should bet how many people are going to get alcohol poisoning next weekend and whoever wins gets a free Starbucks.
officially hit rock bottom.. been yelling through the vent in my room to my little brother trying to convince him to get me water for the past two hours. i fear feeling the full effect of my hangover if i stand.
I DON'T CARE LET'S GET DRUNK AND GO. I STRAIGHTENED MY HAIR DO THIS FOR ME.
Yeah I don't remember why I went to the hospital though but I just called and they have my wallet
it's graduation. he's gonna get congratulations slash emotional i cant believe youre leaving me sex.
I already googled the effects of Molly with my antibiotics, I should be fine.
Why is there even a knowledge base for that?!
SORRY BITCH CAN'T, TAKING SHOTS TO WHITNEY HOUSTON.
The cleaning lady has a form she makes me sign every time she finds me passed out in my office so she can keep track of how much to charge me each month for keeping quiet about it.
As soon as he came we went to Dairy Queen. That drive through lady was very condescending about our "just fucked" ice cream.
Randomize
