I'm watching harry potter...good thing I already know I'm gay
He has that cheese in a can and he's eating it. I have never seen that outside a goofy movie.
Its the Friday before break. There are 20 kids in my 300 person lecture hall. All with the same what the fuck am I doing here look on there face.
You hooked up with 4 random girls, avoided your grilfriend finding out about it, and dodged traffic on Park Ave. Can you say luck of the Irish?
I remember coming home with a cat... I havent seen it all day. Shit.
dude there's no way we're going back in there for your puke shoes
rolling absolute tits, turn on the red lights for when i get home.
All I vaguely remember from last night is getting up on that nice mahogany table and debating about squirrel's rights
Dude! I just figured out I can successfully hide a 4oz flask between my boobs without endangering my cleavage! College: conquered!
You were throwing cups at people in the basement, yelling at them to get out of your swamp.
I got to walk around for eight hours wearing power armor and acting camp. No way I wouldn't love it.
Whats a little naked between friends. Just don't laugh or I'll be scared for life.
christmas shopping: 3 hours in the liquor store...
I just motorbotted some guy and my hair got stuck in his nipple ring...owww
I was asked to be part of a mmf threesome. I think I'd rather stay home, watching Orange is the New Black and cuddle with my cat though
Randomize
