Hey guys thanks for lettin me crash at your place for the weekend, I had a great time. PS I got three quarters of a hand job from an asian on the dance floor last night. True story.
so i just googled the prescription for aldara i saw on your desk this morning...
So when we opened his headboard we found a bottle of crisco sitting on top of his porn magazines.
I guess we all know what he was cookin.
Gym doesn't open till 11. I'm sure that of the other four people waiting in the lobby, I'm the only one still drunk and only going to the gym to shower.
Trying not to fart in the comp lab is going to take everything i've got.
when i was ordering pizza, the guy muffled the phone but i could clearly hear him say "its that drunk bitch again"
she said we were using the spray butter as air freshener
Yeah someone just put a trash bag that says "use protection" on the snow penis
The last thing I remember was talking about the economic viability of cock ring manufacturing... we had some good ideas
I ended up with a bullet proof vest and I still don't know his last name.
Im sitting on the exxon bathroom floor, idk if its healthy but it sure is cold
I think you're my mermaid sister. Separated at birth, by sea.
have you ever seen all dogs go to heaven this is important
Haha. Maybe he's one of those feminine men who fucks like a god then makes you fantastic crepes afterwards
you have to get here a cop came into the bar and she looks like Sarah Palin. I think I'm gonna try and bang her
Randomize
