I don't know if it's her mysterious past or atrocious grammar, but I think I'm in love.
So all semester this guy and girl have been talking, and today is the last class and we are doing nothing. I would have skipped but I want to see if he seals the deal or pusses out. It's like a season finale.
Now I know how you felt every time you had to listen to me have sex with a girl... mildly disguested yet marginally proud.
like semen in my mouth is absolutely disgusting but i'd still like to experience it
I havnt even moved into my new place yet and there's already a county sheriffs card taped to the door with my name on it asking me to call him
It Amazes me that I was able to drunk update my status in Spanish last night.
he told me to hold it and try to write my name in the snow and it seemed like a bonding moment because neither one of us had ever done that before. i didn't anticipate it vibrating and weirding me out therefore making me let go and get my hand peed on.
They're putting plan B in vending machines now. My life just got so much easier.
Most people would probably take his lack of responses as a queue to stop. But nope, not me. I just keep going. And that's why I don't have a bf, just a little weinered friend
We fired a shoe out of a medieval cannon. I know not where we got either one.
I just ordered $70 worth of pizza and I'm not even ashamed. Happy Valentine's Day to me.
Drink. Fuck. Waffle House. Repeat.
You full on peed your pants then resurrected yourself like Jesus Christ...
Hey, I'm sleeping in your car...lol just knock on the window in the morning
You do realize last night you asked me if shampoo had an expiration date then cried for 15 mins when I told you it did
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