Do you feel that fire radiating from matt's crotch for you
Gross. gingers suck
He started to lick my mole,thinking it was my nipple.
we were holding hands throwing up into the same garbage can; if thats not true love i dont know what is .
I just gave some chick my debit card to put in the jukebox. She better put out.
If I can't get a one-legged man to love me, what the hell chance do I have with a NORMAL guy???
Dude they have your information. Come back. The sheriffs office is here, they are pissed..please come back otherwise jail is inevitable. Call me
just mapquested my walk of shame from saturday..bye bye freshman 15
just found out i can blow out the flame on the grill lighter fill my mouth with butane and ignite a fireball
Don't bother coming over to clean the mess. I already paid two kids 5 bucks for it, just didn't tell them you peed all over the place. You do owe me 5 bucks though
I've been here 11 months and i just realized i have literally never looked at my apartment/roomates sober
Nothing $200 worth of strippers and spicy fried chicken couldn't fix.
I'm going to have to include Angry Orchard in my thesis acknowledgements
She showed me her tits outside Taco Bell....After she flashed the dude working there in an effort to get in.
Sooo i'm debating posing nude for the drawing and painting classes, I just wanna see if they draw my nip ring.
But I thought it was so funny last night
You also thought you were a gypsy mermaid last night
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