Damn I can't remmbre the last tome I had sobr sex
Um. I believe with my boyfriend, slut
Fuck. Wron person. But yea
i was like. eff you dude i'm 100% american. i went to a high school prom and i like springstein songs and i take rides in chevrolets.
Hurry. And bring back up. SHE WON'T STOP TALKING.
My brother and I both agreed that your boobs are fake.
of course. lets lasso hookers.
Yeah getting kicked out of the bar at 1 pm really set the tone for the day.
You scratched my dick last night. It deserves an apology and I fell that actions speak louder than words when it comes to apologies like this.
Leave it to us to have a family reunion in a bar bathroom
I'm pretty sure my moms getting nailed in the bathroom right now while I'm chaperoning. God damn it.
we've got reservations. ask for the eat a bag of dicks table
I don't remember, but I believe your goodnight phrase was "nice meeting you, thanks for not macing me"
I asked him to change the channel. There was no way I could do reverse cowgirl with golf on.
Sad realization: so long as I use this sleep apnea machine, I will never be the little spoon!
I'm literally naked with a whole pizza in my lap sitting in my chair.
I got subtly pornographic with a lollipop while we were talking and he got flustered and started to blush. If he’s not interested after that I need to turn in my vagina card.
Randomize
