we have to go try and show our tits so we can get ID-free drinks at applebees
Life lesson: when driving and throwing up, choose a paper bag over plastic. Fuck my life.
dude sorry but u no that when a guys 'likes' ur pic on facebook it only means he was just jacking off to it.
Judging that there's a photo of me getting head while sitting on a graveyard tombstone.....not good.
Is there a reason why the cops knew her name as they were chasing her?
We need to stop sleeping with people based on which NFL team they like.
I guess at this point I should stop judging guys on their looks and more on their major and trust fund. Growing up sucks.
Guess who won bingo at the senior center and is going to jail all in the same night?
I would take a bullet for Beyonce's baby
I will cut you
Oddly enough thats the second time today someones said that to me
Put that in perspective
What is the current exchange rate for ramen to jello shots?
She looks like a Midwestern news anchor that got fired so she has done nothing but eat for the past 6 months.
This weekend I turned down sex to watch the Star Wars marathon... Is this growing up?
Theres just something about today that says lets get drunk, dont you think?
We've been taking shots, cranking Marilyn Manson, and eating your bacon. Your kid is probably ruined.
Randomize