weddingsv make me drug and hornr
i miss you and i wish you were peeing between my legs right now. in a platonic way
I wish i could go to google and type in drug dealers and it would bring up a number, a product and direction
Last night, my friend changed all my contacts in my phone. I have been texted by Batman, Donatello, and Hermione Granger. I have no idea who they are, and it doesn't upset me at all.
you tried to clear everyones facebook status so that yours would be the only one on everyones home page
i just licked mashed potatoes off my blackberry. i'm not even ashamed to admit that to you.
Sorry I didn't wanna double team his sister. Having whiskey dick and watching you get laid didn't sound appealing
I started making my dollar bills into rings for the strippers
The other. Cat spoke to me and left. This shit is laced
The first cat might save me but they are taking out masks
he fell down during beer pong and the chick told him to rub the sand out of his pussy and suck it up. i am in love
I have your car and your sandals. My shoes are somewhere under the puke couch. Safari time.
A gentleman never tells..... therefore i will neither confirm nor deny the attatched photos
I've decided I'm going to drink again. More. Day drinking. Night drinking. Everything. It's the responsible thing to do since I'm not pregnant
Excuse me while I take my birth control pill for today to prevent getting pregnant from hearing about your sex life
She called to tell me she just hooked up with my crush...and that he talked about me...not sure if I should be pissed or excited?
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