and i think we compared dick sizes, then high fived...
there's a sledge hammer in the bottom of the swimming pool... so whatever happened last night was probably awesome
They had to restock the bar 3 times before midnight. There is a bridesmaid dress hanging in a tree outside.
story update. I'm locked out of my house. Walk of shame advisory extended...
Attn: you have now used your free, one time admission to pleasure town. Thank you for visiting I hope you enjoyed your trip. All future trips to P.T. Will cost you full admission price. We have different pricing plans to accommodate different situations, and remember it is more of a bartering system than a set price. Your patronage is always welcomed and once again thank you for visiting and have a fantastic evening.
My roommate made me a peanut butter and sprinkles sandwich. Maybe tonight isn't that bad
You are softly singing to the wall while slow dancing with it. I feel as though you should discontinue this behavior.
I had 5 long islands and 2 alien brain hemorrhages…I am entirely certain that the "power hour to finish the night" idea was just too much.
In sex ed. they really need to include a lesson on saying tampon in foreign languages, just in case.... Trying to ask the woman at the reception desk, who barely speaks English, for one just turned into an awkward game of charades.
He woke up in a dragon costume, covered in bong water. That was a party we will regret missing.
I like how our relationship transcends the borders of inappropriateness and encompasses all the colors of the inappropriate rainbow.
there are LEGIT cum stains on my ceilling. ON THE CEILLING!! you tell me how the relationship was.
Well, I ruined his toilet and he's still completely okay with me. Plus, it took him like a week to tell me.
If a girl I didn't love ruined my toilet I don't think I'd stick around.
hey sorry i didnt call i just got out of jail, so you still dtf ?
eating pizza to get the taste of dick out my mouth wby
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