I told them you could toss a salad like wolfgang puck
i do not condone bathtub ky wrestling
he was pretty good aside from the whole putting his tongue on my butt thing
I'm in class. I'm not opening a page with the words "death erection" in the link. There's people behind me lol.
New development. Drinking at work is so easy and awesome I might have to do it everyday.
People dont know what to do when a naked fat guy is running towards them. they panic
No but I was fuckin done when I realized my acrylic nail caught fire when I was hitting the bong.
Took his shirt off. Announced he was Jesus. Threw up. Asked me to cuddle him to sleep. And then tried to kiss me. Typical Saturday night.
Can I trade you chipotle for a pregnancy test?
I took a dab in Denver and was I. Rocky Mountain national park almost to Wyoming before I realized I missed my turn.
I think my pickup truck has been used for the sex... This doesn't sit right with me.
No, you are in the clear. The police officer finally just said "I give up" and walked away.
im so drunk that this cat is mothering me. aggressively
Keep two things coming: nudes and puppy pictures
don't take this the wrong way, but I'm not drunk but I need you to take me to the ER and you're the most likely to not be drunk now.
Randomize
