just to let you know I saw you texting some Kim chick, and facebook saying she's ugly... good job you're gay now
I wonder what it would be like to masturbate in space
Maryland truck stops are full of people with killer mustaches
It had been so long since my last time that it was easily a double helping of stomach pancakes. I think she was mildly impressed.
she's telling me all about the love triangles of her sims. you tell me how it's going.
I bruise way too easily for the kind of rough sex I want...
Why is your signature on my underwear?
Ps I don't think it counts as being open minded if you didn't know he was missing a leg until you had already started making out.
You have to come over we all bought drinking hats. Mine has a turtle on it. Side note: somehow someone got their hands on 50 candied apples and we need to eat them...
im drunk. people are steering their children away from me. whatever it is that you called for, I assure you that I don't care. have a good night
Update: it wasn't just our driver. This ticket confirms that the Royal Oak PD also found our behavior on the party bus to be "Lewd and Indecent."
I'm about to sell my hamster for weed money I'll call you in a few
I just want him to come back from NOLA alive, without an arrest record or stripper glitter on his clothes...
Those seems like unreasonable expectations for a bachelor party honestly...
Can we get pizza? This is seriously not a booty call. I just really want someone to get pizza with me.
WE ARE DOING DRUGS AND GOING TO THE STRIP CLUB SATURDAY LADIES
Randomize
