We are allowed to think Jacob from Twilight is hot in 468 days!
I don't know what is sadder, the fact that you figured that out or the fact that I can't wait until then!!
The UPD just told me that he was going to call the cops if i try to run. you owe me 5 dollars, i told u they arn't real cops
the only thing you and i have in common is the we like weed and looking at my naked body.
Meh. People are people bro. All of us are hairless psychotic apes. Happy 420.
He just told an 8 year old to go fuck himself so we probably won't be in the butterfly exhibit much longer.
The pastor just stopped the sermon to lay hands on me. THAT hungover.
Yeah, surprised you made it on time this morning. Remarkable, considering 2 hours ago you were pretending to be talking window curtains.
Will you be my therapist? I don't want to tell me secrets to a strange person and be judged all over again when you have already taken the time to do it. Oh and I will pay you with alcohol
I pulled a muscle last night drunk dirty snapchatting him
Our conversation concluded a weekly schedule of casual sex in between classes.
Not remembering where I left my grinder before vacation #stonerproblems
Serious question: is he hot or is my vagina just that barren?
Why do I have this feeling like this is heading in a slightly threesome-y direction
So I love answering sex questions in intimate relationships class on a clicker when im sitting next to my cousin..
Could’ve gone my whole life not seeing a man snort coke off another man’s cock... but there it is...
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