Omg. Get me out of here. Someone is playing michelle branch.
How am I a tease?
Dude you flashed me ur vagina and walked away.
ONLY PART OF IT.
Dude its 315 and I'm sitting here eating slices of cheese. Don't talk to me about tomorrow.
Stripperoke is exactly what it sounds...
Ill trade u your bra for a run to the liquor store...
I'm such a fucking super-fan. I was worried his cum would wash away his autograph.
It's surprise blowjob week. You should be excited.
I feel you. We can get adjoining rooms. It'll be like Disney world, but with drugs and ivs instead of roller coasters and Mickey Mouse.
Which is way cooler
40s are totally the cure
mom had to come pick me up from the hotel. I crawled to her car. She told me the entire way home if I puked in it I was going to lick it up. Like high school all over again...
How is your new roommate working out
We are drinking at the laundromat. And will probably have sex later. So...pretty good.
For future reference, don't put tape on your nipples. Ouch.
I trusted a fart in Toronto. NEVER TRUST A FART IN TORONTO.
I’m not washing my pussy with handsoap.
It’s official. I’ve hooked up with all three brothers now
You should go after Dad now
I should! He’s definitely middle age fuckable
Randomize
