Having a conversation over beer pong about a threesome I participated in...it's only Wednesday
I do regret it. But I can't unfuck her
i just found out that washing ur bong in the dishwasher works. its been a productive day
Dude she has a fucking rock collection. Never will I ever talk to her again.
what did you hear about me?
that you are a very nice girl and a pleasure to be around
that was hard to say and not laugh
If I banged a coworker last night but didn't enjoy it can I put it down on my timesheet?
Youre on making sure I dont black out around fat chicks duty
He wore my sunglasses on his honeymoon..... so there's that.
I would ask what did you do but I feel like who did you do is probably more appropriate
Yup. We're now banned from TWO of our nation's finest zoos.
On duty sugar tits. A Marine never abandons his post to take nudi pics.
Honestly, it's his loss. He went for the free sample when he could've gotten the whole package, babes.
does that make me the free sample at the grocery store he didn't like enough to buy...? yeah, that advice didn't help, but thanks.
I keep thinking your bag of thongs is a bag of chips. So mad I can't eat them.
I'm really hot. went tanning and this cheeseburger shirt like isn't breathable
Just ushered a raccoon across the street so yeah.. Good night
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