the bulge in his pants is not junk. its hair. trust.
I just wnated to let you know that I laminated my history notes so i can study in the shower.
Goodbye hot boy in my geo class...goodbye my lover, goodbye my friend. you have been the one, you have been the reason I came to claassss
I had to throw up. it was the only way to avoid kissing her after she swallowed..
Just kicked a guy in his penis in order to win a dance contest on Bourbon....desperate.
He's throwing up in my bed and I'm not even getting fucked for this
There was an ice luge. Lets just leave it at that.
We told our cab driver we'd give him 3 grand if he pit maneuvered you guys in your cab.
We aren't really supposed to respect our bodies til our mid twenties.
I think that "I fucked your little brother" wasn't the best way to introduce yourself.....
We established that I was in 5th grade when she was in her final year of grad school. Her daughter is also in 5th grade.
in the middle of getting head my cat meowed. she looked up , meowed back, and then continued giving me head.
Before he left he told me if his girlfriend ever finds out, she'll take us both to an alley and kill us.
I can't tell if this is a hangover or just a perfect combination of shame and regret
Last night this creepy guy asked me my name and I told him it was Jaundice and he called me that all night
Randomize
