Every time I hang out with your gay friend, I have to make a checklist of words to look up when I get home. First Google of the night? "Power bottom."
I am like the Mr. Miyagi of queefs.
i just put a booger in my mom's hair and i just needed to tell someone.
If i die in the snow, get to my laptop and delete all of the nickelback. password is "barry"
as in "white"?
i just watched a special on porn, the business isn't doing so good. You may want to wait before you start your career
HE COULDN'T FIND IT! WHAT KIND OF QUARTERBACK CAN'T FIND IT?!
You obviously dont comprehend the level of insane i operate at
I was tripping so hard I was disappointed when I pulled back the shower curtain and shrek wasn't standing there
they were having sex on the toilet apparently and everytime someone knocked they flushed. it was like an auditory scoreboard of sex duration.
How hard do you think it would be to make a drinking game out of a Slip-N-Slide? Asking for a friend.
You threw up on his face 22 hours ago and now he's here holding your hand. I think he likes you.
My mom just told me I look like darth vader. how's your night?
Afterwards he face timed like four of his friends screaming he banged the hot intern.
We will just distract him with tacos and porn.
I don't know..He walked out of your room with a kraft single..and blood on his shirt...He really wanted cheese.
Randomize
