Think the blond can even spell "shiksa"?
i effin hate jeff goldbloom.
but i totally would still bang him
hey my socially awkward cousin is our designated driver for summer, we just have to put up with her wierd shit.
It's a Westpoint/Army thing, we talk about Miley Cyrus a lot
Why?
Because when is jailbait ever not funny? Answer: Never
STOP acting like a freshman, you have a drivers liscence now AND a PERSCRIPTION for birth control. Dont give all sophmores a bad name. Woman Up
i was way too optimistic last night... got back to my apartment and the porch light was still on, like i'd actually make it all the way home.
I'm eating crumbled blue cheese out of Tubbaware. My life is nothing.
I should start prefacing bondage with girls saying "I know you've read 50 Shades, but there is a 33% you're gonna freakout and go home, while I jerk it alone"
id one day like to live in a world full of emotionless and wonderfully fullfilling sex...
Haha it's harder than you'd think to come up with ways to turn your penis into a Christmas drawing
Dude, you got arrested for trying to direct traffic with your dick....
THIS FUCKNUGGET
DOES HE EVEN REALIZE HOW MANY INCREDIBLE INSULTS I'VE WASTED ON HIM
I'VE INSULTED THE EVERLOVING SHIT OUT OF HIM AND HE CAN'T EVEN APPRECIATE IT
THE HO
He kept spinning my wedding ring like thanks buddy I remember
So hungover that I might just sit in my car and wait until chipotle opens...in two hours...
is it sad that a disney movie is making me horny?
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