You burnt your salmon and tried to mail it. Post marked to: Starving Kid in Africa
Hey! Thanks for asking, but it didnt go well. He threw up in the car on the way to dinner. Blind dates arent for everyone.
the way i see it, im about one adderall binge away from graduating
There's an australian, my relationship has no hope.
idk but i have you stored in my phone as 'guy with beard doing body shots'
He came in my eye, I lost my earring and all of his friends saw me topless. Happy New Year to you as well.
Escorted a stripper to her car last night,and all I got was a "Thanks" and "Go Steelers."
Please don't let me drink ever again. I apparently told him he could stay but as there was no room in the bed he'd have to lie on top of me and he'd need to anchor himself on with his penis so he didn't fall off.
Just got flashed by an entire bus of girls in school uniforms. We then had to wait beside each other at a light. It was awkward.
I don't listen when you talk. I just try to find new creative ways to get you to send me naked pictures.
I don't fucking know. I'm out stimulating the economy. Not locked in a room with a marker board.
Oh at the liquor store again?
In case you're wondering what I'm doing, I'll be banging an 18 year old this weekend. Repeatedly.
When I told her I was deaf and took my hearing aids out at night to sleep, she said it must be nice not having to hear drunken roommates having awkward sex late at night.
i need to get drunk because i'm an angry sober
Dude she is fucking shit up. Her baby would be proud
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