Ross. Joey. Chandler. Who would you do?
Dude, totally just found out that I've been washing my hair with semen for the past 3 weeks.
I'm way too drunk on a Sunday to handle this level of Jesus.
So can you tell me who's underwear is on the cat?
yeah, but the likliness of me finding my husband at a party where the facebook event is titled "NEW YEARS EVE SHIT SHOW" is highly unlikely
Totalylr drunk. Coveredc in cryola marker. Loving it. Straight men everywhere. Don't be surprises when I'm pregbat romorrowwwww
I have to stop drunkenly making out with guys just because they're tall or have a beard.
I had to find out that I peed in the box of baby clothes from my mom, who found out from my grandma. New low.
well, the two that sent pics I've already been with, so at least its not just BAM HERE'S MY PENIS IN YOUR INBOX ENJOY THOSE MEGAPIXELS
He changed his profile picture to him as a baby. Definitely a turn off. This will help in my "don't-be-a-slut-endeavors"
He was asleep with his head on a windowsill and you were petting his head, then you almost left the kitchen and then went back to pet him some more.
Is 36 too old to fuck a college student? THIS IS BOTH IMPORTANT AND TIME SENSITIVE
My hot gay tattoo artist grew a beard and I'm not taking it well.
I'M TRYING. TO WATCH. PORN. PLS HAVE UR IMPORTANT DISCUSSIONS ELSEWHERE FUCKERS
I'm just going to assume my unresponsive booty calls are just preparing for the women's march tomorrow
Randomize
