Took an aderol, wrote a differential equation for solving volume of flow of a rectangular channel with change in depth, then masturbated for the 6th time.
For his 21st I'm getting a fancy hotel that way he can at least sleep in a nice bathtub
Fuck, now I'm not only the other woman, but the pregnant one
He tied my whole arm, in its cast, to the headboard first. He mumbled something about safe, sane, and consensual?
Aaaand I cut your bangs with a large knife last night ...
Can we play rock paper scissor shot again? I want to black out in 15 minutes or less...
When I ask you to make sure no ones coming while I'm changing.. The logical friend would keep watch. But you my, best friend come stand in front of me and flash everybody.
Currently siting in the living room naked, staring at one of the girls across the street in her living room naked. This is like the most intense starting contest of all time.
Next time you're baked eat baked beans and potato chips together. Like dip them in the beans. It's so good
I should not be so motivated by a penis, but I am
But that's fine. Because I am an independent woman who is going to pull some jane Goodall shit and save the world one day......or be a porn star......either way they are going to wish they had fucked me.
I bought a vibrating wall dildo with my tax return. You?
What'd I miss?
Erotic hypnosis and studded dog collars.
I would like to make it known to all of you that my penis is official retired, but it thanks you for the countless years of service you provided
I woke up to a gigantic ft-long tootsie roll and a note by drunk me with the words "you're welcome"
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