he said he didn't have a condom.
and you said?
that that's fine cause i was ready to be a mom. yeah - he magically had a condom he forgot about after that.
make any headway on the foot/dick situation?
can you explain to me why you commented on every one of my profile pics with "tits and beer ftw" please and thank you.
I shagged another guy with one ball last night. Are there really that many dudes with one nut in la or am I just a magnet for prostetic testes?
So i learned you can't hair-of-a-dog jaeger hangovers.
i was gonna do a lot worse than just throw cat food on you while you were passed out, but then you sleep vomited and i felt a little bad
I'm not liking this ratio of moving to blowjobs...
Tonight just try not to threaten to pee on the hot guys buying us drinks....please..
He got kicked out 3 times. I have no idea how he kept getting back in. I saw him walking on the highway the next morning.
someone wrote my own number down on my hand and then call me.
it's just weird to think of you as a teacher since ive seen you throw up raspberry bacardi in my parents house
This whole having a new phone thing is like starting all over in life with a clean slate! (My old text convos are gone)
New phone new life!
Masturbated furiously for a half hour; ate a fistful of chocolate, then took a nap. Woke up and finished wrapping presents. I've got this holiday thing down.
I’m doing some soul searching to figure out how much of a slut I’m going to be the rest of the summer.
I don't care how many things you caught on fire, it's still not as bad as doing coke and then filming yourself having sex.
Randomize
