Man, ugly runs in her family
yeah, big time
Let's start a violent farting gang. We can do walkbys.
as evidence of my kitchen this morning my night involved alot of mustard and condoms
We're 3 acts into this drag show and we've already run out of Lady Gaga songs.
hey. so did i get tied up by a jumprope last night?
Definitely want to eloquently cunt punt those bitches thru the field goals of life.
Seriously, I'm making a calendar and marking off the days with little penis's
I'd return your shirt, but it got all wet from lying on the bathroom floor while I was in the shower with Justin's roommate...
Keep it.
Well. No wine. And no real mixers. I'm using vodka and grape juice and calling it Slurrrlot. Happy Holidays bitch.
You need to stop me from lighting my hand on fire next time we're working
i made this one couple from ohio so uncomfortable that they left....and that was WHEN I HAD PANTS ON
You called me a pussy and continued to eat an entire jar of peanut butter with only your hand.
Right now, I'm sitting in my room, drinking beer, eating double stuff Oreos, taking bites straight from a block of cheese, and watching Anchor Man 2 trailers. Finals week at its finest
Carver called his mom a milf again
Was it on purpose this time?
Talking to a customer about getting high and staring at glow in the dark wheels while there is a cop in the store. Just another day in Tampa
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