If it makes you feel better he went down on me when i had a yeast infection.
his blackberry tasks were 1. take names and 2. kick ass
I was giving him head and when I deep throated him he screamed out "Ohh, top ten!"
Just looked at my outgoing calls. Seems I had a 7 minute convo with my 10th grade english teacher at 2:56 am Saturday...
K. On the way. I need a drink.
Like a drink drink or like water?
Have we met?
He asked me to coffee and I had no choice but to be honest. So naturally I told him that sobriety and monogomy are not two of my strong suits.
we should hire that guy that makes pancakes that we met last weekend for our next party. He can feed us, and regulate!
Wanna hang out, and by hang out I mean go get plan B... and maybe lunch, but mostly plan b
I will start puting down the plastic for the vom in our love chamber. If you want to be something or someone else for the night feel free. The theme is shit show.
I'm there.
Okay throwing up in my mouth a little = time to go home
Jesus Christ. If I were a normal sex-having person, I'd think I was knocked up. I'm cycling through emotions like I'm in a decathlon to crazy.
Sorry for throwing up in your humidifier last night, I thought it was some sort of electrical garbage can
WHY IS THERE A GOLD FISH IN MY BONG??
Omg I just woke up in his bed.. I'm fully clothed and he is naked. I'm so confused.
Woman doing my Brazilian right now says to tell you she says hi...what has our life come to?
Randomize
