i am exhausted. it's been years. we both know his dick is small. the jig is up.
So if you want this MFM threesome thing to happen the other guy is here and willing
WHY AM I ALWAYS DEFEATED BY THE LATIN COCK?!?!
Our logic class started an hour ago, I walked out and found my sister drunk, sitting down, eating m&ms, afraid to walk in... I want her life
I think I may be stoned foreverrrrrrrrr. The earth has been around for a long time.
Also while I am being the bigger person I plan on bringing over something strong smelling and/or alcoholic to torture the poor hungover bastard
Based on the time of Sean's "I'm on your street" phone call last night, we had sex for an hour and a half. Man, time flies when you're getting boned to an orgasmic death.
I only got lap dances from the ugliest strippers, i couldnt stop myself from laughing the entire time.
get ready to load up the weird cannon and blow a load of buck-wildness all over the place people
Can't wait to hear which one of you won the 'fuck a bigger geek' contest last night. Queen Amidala vs Lara Croft. See you at breakfast.
After a few mimosas, my mom started sharing her plans to move out of the house and into a retirement village so she can be the youngest one there and find herself a "nice old sugar daddy." Needless to say, break has not started off well...
There are no female cereal mascots. I just realized that in my drunken state... So sexist...
I'm hoping you were seen by someone holding a frozen turkey at 230 in the morning
all im saying is 27 is too old to still be drinking 40s, you make more money than me, buy some decent shit
screw you you golddigging beer snob
After dropping your phone on the ground you got down and sat with it, kissed it and apologized for being so mean
Randomize
