Mel Gibson is dating a 24 year old
You're not Mel Gibson and I'm not 24.
bitch so ugly she owes me an erection
im too high. i could barely wash my hair, let alone handle a whole shower
he used the word "rubber" i just couldn't do it after that.
We've been friends for six months, when do my benefits kick in?
was his dick as big as our hopes and dreams?
She had forties taped to her hands and was trying to give him a hand job while he was passed out, with everyone in the living room.
I went down on her for 35 minutes and didn't even get a handy. I've never felt more desire to be gay in my life.
Woke up naked next to Alex and he was braiding my hair and then commented on how healthy my hair was. I don't even know anymore..
You don't understand, we were on a waffle house. Both of us were absolutely certain we passed out at his place then BAM! Waffle house.
BRING ME THE PLAN B. ILL GIVE YOU A FREE WATER BOTTLE AND A BUMPER STICKER AND SOME BACON BITS
Things you Cant unsee: When your smartphone syncs to your dads laptop and downloads photos...including his porn stash.
He yearns for your heart.
He needs to stop being a pussy about it.
Accidentally made a bowl of macaroni and cheese with a bottle of vodka. It's not that bad
She was shaving her legs in the neighbors pool when we found her.
Where'd she get the razor?
Not the point.
Randomize
