We should steal a little kid and go to Chucke Cheese
I'm such a slut...i kept having sex with him after he called me his ex gf's name. I just felt like i deserved something out of it too.
Considering last night's endeavors, I am going to hell 5 times over. 1 for puking on a hobo, 1 for laughing about it, and 3 for remembering it today and laughing about it sober
my entire walk over here no one looked in my eyes. Period Boobs are BAACKKK.
Sober January is a disaster.
God my Facebook chat is a graveyard of old blowjobz
I found him with a guitar and his kitten in his room. He was singing a song he'd titled "you're a cat". Guess what most of the lyrics were...
I want to get my vag crammed with complete loss of every bit of dignity I have left by this man from every angle on every flat surface that exists. That is all.
She's dressed as a slutty goth schoolgirl. Those are my three favorite things. God himself could not give me whiskey dick.
If I got everything I wanted in the world, I would have been forcing soup down your throat hours ago
What good is being a girl if you can't terrorize boys with pregnancy scares??
I'm done being drunk I wish I could snap my fingers and be sober
Sometimes I wish I lived alone because there would be no one to judge me if I wanted to have whiskey and popcorn for breakfast.
Not entirely sure how I got drunk off 2 mimosas but here I am
You burped in your shoe and whispered 'you're mine now'
Randomize
