And she was only 16?
You say that like it's a bad thing.
it was all downhill after the free blackjack taco
Why does Thanksgiving make hot girls feel disgusting and fat girls feel horny? Its killing my prospects.
he sent me this 10 second long video of a gorilla eating a banana on my phone. no explanation. I didn't even have his number. just. a gorilla eating a banana.
he had his head down and said he was listening for the buffalo, he had to still be drunk.
you just kept bragging about how there was a "pretty large" chance that you had pooped on the same toilet as George Clooney
Babe, I need to be clear. I DO NOT WANT TO HAVE ANAL. Never. No anal. No "talking about it"
Do your friends by chance have our inflatable deer head?
Nevermind, it's in the dryer.
the condom is still stuck, that's what I get for being responsible
I found all these half eaten mandarin orange on the ground and the bruises on my neck are definetely not hickies
Suspicion confirmed. my mom has her nipples pierced
Way to crack the case Nancy Drew
I have bruises all over my legs. Did I hit a car with my bike last night?
wait he has a twin??? which one did you fuck
yes
He just ate a tooth whitening strip...
may or may not have snorted a line of tums... wtf.
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