would you kill someone to have someone deliver pancakes to you when you were high?
Hungover Fun Fact #4: Eating a grilled stuffed burrito WILL make you blow chunks in the ice maker at work.
at least he lost his v-card with a bang... or should i say the clap.
Every single time I start thinking that we shouldn't have done that to him, I think of his ballsack in our passed out faces. No sympathy.
I asked for a dramatic "funeral" look for my makeup. They judged me.
I just feel like a little gay dolphin in a massive sea
We're doing kegstands for my 80th Bday, so don't lose that muscle tone.
I drunk-cried for all conjoined twins everywhere the other day.
Remember when there was a happier time when people could all hang out together with out the awkwardness of the fact that she stole $1000 and cheated on a brother with another brother !?!??
There is a video recording of my birth. I have seen it. It is terrifying.
Okay so the couple who keep propositioning people for threeways are def siblings not bf/gf
So are you gonna do it or no you said they're hot
he fucked me while wearing his "Reagan Bush '84" tank and my inner democrat has never been more disappointed
I'm drunk listening and crying to Selena. How's your Monday?
Kid walks in and orders 24 Mcdoubles and 14 large fries, as he's handing me the money he tells me he lost at rock paper scissors so he had to do the munchie run.
He was about to go in...and he fell off the bed. Ruined mood!
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