2 nights ago she wants to see other people, tonight she wants to have a threesome. The GOOD kind of threesome. So... win?
im not an educated person. i just do things. and it works out in my favor
every time I see Anne Hathaway all I can think is "my cousin fucked a guy who fucked her" and it makes me proud.... so I want to say thank you for being that cousin.
hey you sure the big one didn't have a penis she left the seat up
Like that time I held Annie up and she peed all over the window.. We make a good team.
No, I've only ever seen his brother's dick. So when I have lucid sex dreams, I just do a little cut and paste in my mind and stick his bro's package onto him.
It's totally ok to sleep with him. The only place I have feelings for him is in my vagina.
Did you Fuck minivan and her friend last night?
My radar detector detects ice cream trucks. I think it was made for stoners
There's not really an emoticon that says "I'm sorry I honked your boobs, and that you weren't a fan of that."
We should try to put a bagel on your penis
I woke up in the basement of a pizza restaurant... I would say the tequila hit me pretty hard.
Googled 'how drunk am I' and it was NOT helpful
She's chasing the cat around the house hitting it with a cardboard sword yelling "there can be only one!"
I’ve slept with a Senior, a Freshman and a Junior so far. I’m a Sophomore away from hitting for the cycle
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