My toast was "here's to being positive, and testing negative... Cheers!"... after that chick gagged on her shot, everyone knew.... slut.
shes wearing a jean skirt, its frayed. i got this
The nice sales man at 711 gave me a handful of free lighters for buying a carton of cigarettes. I guess the depressed damsel in distress look works for me.
I'm gonna put my relationship status as "widowed" to see if it helps me get some poon.
the guy next to me needed a pen, so I let him take one from my book bag. my panties are now being passed around the class...thank you for telling me you hid them in my bookbag.
Most fantastic sex ever until her Doberman took an interest in what we were doing. There was nothing more terrifying then feeling warm dog breath on my ballsack.
i feel like god sat there all night pointing and laughing at me
We decided that the paper cups disintegrating was god's way of telling us we had had enough
She made me go down the fire escape when her mom came for breakfast.
I feel like I'm full of double a batteries and cocaine.
I'll do a soapy photo shoot for you in the shower. No loofas, though. Once you get one of those caught in your nipple ring, you never go back.
She sucks. And I almost hooked up with a clown last night
crossed #23 off the Slucket List!
YOU JUST MADE YOUR SLUCKET LIST THIS MORNING.
Lol I screamed "GOT AN ORDER OF VERSACE TACOS UP" and the whole kitchen was just like who the fuck is this kid
Every time I try to do something productive I end up searching ghost porn.
Randomize
