i just found out that washing ur bong in the dishwasher works. its been a productive day
so do the steelers give the refs blowjobs at halftime or after the game?
i pounded out a 17-yr-old on saturday night
no, that is not a typo
i turned her down on fri night, googled the state consent laws & then caved on saturday
I will come to your office dressed as a bloody mary, hug you then leave is that a good plan?
yes. bring a barf bucket too. just. in. case.
thank you whoever used my nalgene as a flask. pregamin in chem
Wtf are freshmen gonna think when the first thing they see in a pale 6'4 white kid with a mustache yelling ya man and we be liming in a Trinidadian accent
Also my vagina isn't a crater of death where nothing comes out
It's gonna be ok. As we grow older we sometimes lose sight of what's important to us. Like safe sex. And standards.
Hey, I'm renting a storage locker for the summer to keep all my bondage shit in so my parents don't see it. You wanna split on it for your all your weed shit?
Conversations we need to have while high 1) how mermaids reproduce 2) if blind people hallucinate what do they see 3) reincarnation
I guess that's what I get for clicking on a link that says clown penis.
There is a time and place for BDSM, in-between disney sing-alongs is not one of them.
premonition: im going to wake up covered in mashed potatoes
still can't believe dude took a personal call while he was balls deep in my mouth.
he's smothering me... and not in the good, can you move your thigh off my face please?.. way
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