She's JV to your varsity
I am good. I dancing. Drinking but dancing fine.
The first sip always goes straight to my vagina.
why are there beer bottles in my dishwasher?
i hate this class. from the way they're all staring you would think they've never seen a girl in basketball shorts, heels and sunglasses.
let's be real here, you have a beautiful vagina. this kid is a doctors son. that's a remedy for beautiful rich grandkids. he is just trying water his family tree, and make sure he doesn't end up in some piece of shit adult home. go for it.
My fridge broke, and apparently the back is missing. The repair guy just fixed it with a pizza box. I didn't ask where the box came from, but it wasn't mine. Reason #20 why rent is cheap.
Starting St Patrick's Weekend, non stop flights on Pacific Whorelines to the scenic HotMessXpress. Get the cougars ready, it's gonna get weird.
In local news, attempts to hide phone from extremely drunk self prove unsuccessful for Dallas woman.
Halloween is the end of the singles holidays they don't start again until st. Patrick's day we better get wifed up or it's going to be a long winter lol
It's still 8am.
Yeah, but its wine drunk. WITH A DOCTOR. THAT MAKES MY MORNING CLASSY.
I flashed my cleaning lady and don't remember who I went on a date with. I know who I woke up with though, that counts right?
We were sad, then we got horny, and then we needed some ranch
Grateful to be alive soliciting dick pics. Thankful i'm alive for these little things and especially these big ones too.
Wanna go on a picnic?
... by picnic I mean wanna sit on a blanket and drink with me?
Randomize
