i jus seen this fat chick walk buy look like she had don king coming out her arm pits..
I can't wait to see her breast feed this thing
just woke up on my balcony. who won the super bowl?
Hypothetical question: how bad would bacardi be as an IV drip?
death...100% death...what r u planning.
a kid puked on the floor and instead of, you know, cleaning it they cut a square out of the carpet with a boxcutter and threw it outside
Can't wait to bequeath this flannel to my grandchildren someday.
'I've been using this to pick up lesbians since before you were born!'
preface to our conversation: my vagina hurts.
I'm told I threw my cigarettes at the TV one by one Shouting about the cast of Community.
You yelled "NICE PAJAMAS" at a construction worker wearing a reflective jumpsuit while we rode past on a bike taxi
I hate political talk. I just wanna get fucked into an alternate universe where Bernie Sanders is president.
There's glitter all over his bed from my Pink VS panties... I think I might invest in similar styles as a way of marking my territory just incase.
This reminds me of the time you were crying and puking in the toilet at that party while i did shots of tequila in between blow drying your feet. miss you!
So then I got so stoned I sat and took my pulse for 10 minutes.
There's a pregnant girl taking shots of apple juice
Only if I get to be Gritty
How would you be Gritty for a fantasy hockey league?
Don't worry about it.
Randomize