i am fully taking advantage of taking advantage of him
Im at the zoo right now high out of my mind and feel as if the animals are watching me and Im the one in a cage.
the fact that he forgave me for making out with the bartender is proof that i can fuck my way out of anything.
But life isn't just all about getting drunk & eating chicken strips.
In one night, this kid threw a firecracker under a fucking cop car, crashed three seperate parties, and passed out in a tree in our backyard. Do you even know who he is?
do you know how hard it is to walk a mile drunk on 151 it's hard yards are soft and every girl looks good
I think i just threw up blood. i can't chill right now;
Walked up in time to hear him say "you saw I was in a relationship on facebook? So why are you holding my nuts?" To her. That's loyalty man
I guess that means I was blowing a nerd last week.
And loving it.
Update: day 5 and Scott has not left the apartment. Still smoking. Pizza roll supply dwindling.
They say find what you're good at... Evidently that's showing up late for everything, drinking, and eating cheese for me.
Just heard a 15 minute program on the radio about how cases of gonorrhea in the throat and rectum are skyrocketing in the US. Almost crashed laughing so hard.
Sorry, who is this??
He showed up at my house with roses and a bottle of vodka... to watch a movie. obvi i took the vodka and didn't sleep with him
Sexting gets boring after a while. I'm eating a sandwich right now and googling 'sexting ideas' and just copy/pasting lines.
It's a good sandwich though.
I've never had to say don't judge me for chip clips in the shower before
Randomize