I feel like i just miscarried Jesus's baby...
he's 24. he finally texted me instead of using facebook chat. baby steps.
Hey, my drug test is at 4:15 tomorrow. I'll meet you 5 minutes later.
She is only going home with him in hopes to give him herpes. She has been plotting some master revenge since 7th grade.
Believe it or not, Travis and I simultaneously breaking beer bottles over eachothers heads was not a good idea.
That girl is nothing but trouble. She's 40% red hair and 60% daddy issues.
Please tell me how I go from a guy with a coke problem to a cop. My own life doesn't even make sense to me anymore
Ok ladies its the usual spring break system. 5 for a guy, 10 for a non-lesbian girl and double points is its a group thing. Hottest guy of the day is an additional 15. GAME ON
I would of joined had I not blacked out last night and ran around naked breaking things till 4 am
I wish our county sheriff had a comment section for their mugshots.
Let's knock shit down like godzilla and have intense sex in the rubble
I'm high. ignore me
This isn't good. I can't find my mom. This is why we don't give her Fireball.
The house across the street caught on fire today, Drunk people high centered their car tonight. Looking out my front window I get to watch police chases all the time. I am going to miss this place.
My prof handed me back my essay on Lesbians in literature, gave me an A and then we had sex in her office. Told you she was gay.
I wrote notes to myself all over my body. "don't yell at cops again" "Cody stole your phone" "you kissed Cody" "vodka shots are bad for your liver" and "cactus pretty" WTF????
Randomize