Yep, it's a dick on our front door. Intentional?
Those strippers last night smelled great. It was the perfect mixture of vanilla and daddy issues.
I am at a bar watching a rat tail get braided.
so how do you plan on seducing my econ TA?
by telling him that he has a large supply and that i demand it...in my mouth. it shows him that i'm slutty and that i pay attention in econ
I'm pretty sure I just woke up to one of the airport janitors saying that she wanted to tie me up and do something.. I couldn't hear what, thank god
like he couldn't stop by and throw me in the back seat and ask for a blowjob? he had to give me flowers?
i look like a southern belle. however, i am around a million kegs. so i will be a southern shitshow.
she didnt realize that i was putting on the same condom i used the night before with some other girl
Ur dog was like a damn middle school chaperone this morning trying to lay between us after what he saw us do last night
Let's get really high and wear fake mustaches and try not to laugh at each other...
We stared down the barrel of pure insanity, took more and the electric elephant god rewarded our fearlessness by giving me golden skulls and naked women crawling out of the walls. I love acid
Like we were literally doing coke off his insulin pump
So, I have realized that I am kryptonite for married men. I'm not sure how to feel about this sober, but drunk me accepts her destiny.
I almost had sex in a public restroom last night in case you're wondering how much of a mess 22 is for me
Hello! Time means nothing. Good morning! I have a vague idea of what day it is.
It is Muednethiday, March 34th, in the Year of Our Lord Joe Exotic 3099.
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