Yay Minnesota! I can't believe there's now a US Senator who has taken more acid than we have
im so glad i don't have to work tomorrow. I'm spendin all night on the new call of duty.
Wow. That's the gayest thing you ever said.
Look man i'm staying in playing videogames and growing a beard. Its not like i'm trying to get a girlfriend.
I wonder if u can grow weed on Framville and sell it to Mafia Wars?
The lack of respect you have for your penis baffles me. I'd rather rub my ball sack on public toilet seats than stick my dick in some of those girls.
A simple 'no' would have sufficed
I just watched a blind kid buy from one of the vending machines on campus...guess there's nothing like a good surprise?
I think I should receive an honorary Heisman... I mean, I did sleep with two of the finalists
Is everything ok? Last time I missed your call you were being arrested.
okay, please tell me Cammy is the one who put the picture and note on my desk saying "beat off to this homeboy"
Note to self: don't tell your girlfriends dad you can have his daughter in bed by ten and home by midnight. He doesnt find it funny
Judging by the garbled spelling in the calendar reminders in my phone, drunk me really wanted sober me to take a pregnancy test today.
Can you think of a sexual word rhyming with snorkel?
Im just confused who has their mom break up with someone
I appreciate your acceptance of my lack of morals
Not saying I'm a lesbian. Just saying that every time she walks by I wanna scissor her
I FEEL LIKE HILARY MUST FEEL WHEN TRUMP MANSPLAINS AT HER
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