we got back to my place and he started talking about feelings. i politely told him to leave and that he managed to cock block himself.
hahaha he is wasted in math class right now and is drawing all the planets in order from the sun
Just found a keg and a mini-bike in our garage, this couldn't possibly go wrong
In case you were wondering, my scare crow is wearing your outfit from last night.
Call me when your ready for an explanation about the ham in your vagina.
We left your bucket of puke on your doorstep to clean out yourself. You're welcome.
yeah the little voice in my head screaming YOU NEED TO GET LAID eventually grew legs and started kicking me so to avoid brain damage i had to fuck him
Phone sex soon? I mean date. Sex date. Date phone.
all 3? possibly?
I think I'm up to the challenge.
you strike me as the kind of person who when they spill something on their lap they take off their pants and eat it anyways. right off the crotch seam.
Just beer bonged tequila, broke into the hotel next door and got chased by security. It's spring break
I just really hate taking care of things... If I can't fill it with liquor I'm not sure what to do with it.
we both turned hook ups into relationships we are crushing this thing called life right now.
Update. A gay dude just told me I'm the most beautiful thing with a vagina he as ever seen. How should I feel about this?
congratulations on joining the accidental bisexual club
I don’t care how cute or big a guy is I’m done with drunken hand jobs. It was like I was pulling a nine inch bungee cord for 25 minutes. Now My arm and shoulder is dead
Randomize
