You wanna call me after your homoerotic shower?
It was still light ouot when we were walking up Pier Ave and she kept asking if she could suck my nipples.
I should be sponsored by Trojan
in the morning i found her name, number and address on one of the empty pizza boxes. also said "ps. if you find my shoes please mail to me."
oh, you know. just sitting in my bed high as fuck wearing a windbreaker and watching british tv.
No need to get angry I'm just tryin to get my door back
I need a vacation from myself..this is duely noted after I tried giving myself a concussion last night
Everything smells like vodka and bologna. WHAT DID YOU DO?
It started as ''I want a romantic life right now'' text. It ended with pool table sex.
BTW I totally understand panda express being popular amongst the highs. I can feel the shrimp being slaughtered in my mouth. It's fantastic.
This morning I got out of bed 4 HOURS LATE, made eggs with a plastic beach shovel, and then ate them using pens like chopsticks in my bed with my turtle. Obviously, I am not in the mood to be proactive with my life today...
American Eric just peed on us from the second floor. Hes now very confused as to why his "toilet is yelling." Send help.
I would steal a car if I knew it had wheat thins in it
is it necessary to steal the whole car?
I say camping because "let's go get hammered in the woods" sounds kinda fucking weird to be honest.
I love friends. Friendship is wonderful. I wish the rain was my friend
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