I got called a slut by a bunch of girls that work at Hooters..wtf is that shit? explain that to me
well i just puked at a family gathering so i can cross that off the bucket list
He can't get past my hymen. At least that's what he said it feels like.
I can't believe you made out with me with a french fry in your mouth.
walkin around the woods blazed, drawing pictures of trees and plants, i get a grade for this
Knitting and drinking wine. Forget my 21st birthday, might as well just skip to my 60th
This flask doesn't match my outfit. I hope the gays don't mind.
Let's go free Charlie Sheen and party with him
And i didn't ask you to do that, You showed your penis at your own free will.
so i guess now we know you can get away with peeing mere feet from the Capitol if you shout IM PREGNANT at the guards
I was told I sang Taylor Swift's entire discography in between violent bursts of green vomit before falling asleep in the bath tub
He literally wrote out a schedule. On it, there's a taco break, and a spot where I start crying.
Sext: Bring me pancakes from the midnight breakfast gathering please
Spending the night with him made me realize that stupid people both irritate and fascinate me, so I'd say it equaled itself out.
Apparently I bought a laptop last night, then gave the laptop to a friend who was going to give it to her friends' friend to put some cool shit on it. Anyway, I have no idea where my new laptop is now.
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